First (and worst) you get the beeping, which is nearly earsplitting by itself. Then you get to change the tone from a high pitched squealing fluctuation all the way down to a mildly earsplitting caterwaul.
Then you get the bed shaker. It is a small, palm sized vibrator that you place under your pillow or mattress. It emits a pulsating, vibrating wake up call that jars you awake in a physical way. Sure, through a super ultra jumbo ridiculous king sized bed, you can’t feel it all to much, but just knowing it is there is enough to be perfectly annoying.
Everything is fully customizable. You can choose 12 or 24 hour time, if you want the shaker and alarm, or just alarm, or just shaker, or none at all. You can change the volume. You can change the… did I mention everything?
Sleep through your alarm clock regularly? I’m guessing you won’t have nearly as hard a time as you did before. Someone Set Us Up the Bomb, no, wait, I’m awake. I’ll get up. Seriously, just stop!